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February 14-21, 2007

Happiness more than a smiley feeling

Warm-up Question:

What task or activity in life do you like the least, but do anyway?

 

What mother, when asked, wouldn’t say they love being a parent of a small child and that it is a great source of happiness? Psychologists studying happiness—yes, there are people who study happiness—say that there’s a lot more to being happy than mothers are letting on to.

There are some increased pressures and stresses that come with being a parent. "Moment to moment, you may be exhausted, frustrated, sometimes angry," says Peter Ubel, M.D., a professor of medicine and psychology at the University of Michigan. "You may be squabbling with your spouse more. You have more negative emotions." The time you spend taking care of your child may not even be the high point of your day.

When compared to other pleasurable activities, being a mom ranked lower than eating, exercising, or watching TV, according to a University of Michigan study of 900 women. Taking care of kids ranked slightly higher than housework, working, or commuting.

"Happiness is more than just that smiley feeling," says Karen Reivich, Ph.D., a research associate in the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania. "It's also feeling a connection to something larger than yourself. When people are in service to something bigger, they describe their lives as filled with meaning. It's not the smiley face, but when it's all over, you realize you'd do it again."

Remembering the great little moments and the feeling of being needed also contribute greatly to a sense of happiness when it comes to being a parent.

 

Discussion Questions

  1. What would you list as the challenges and the "happy" things of being a parent—from your perspective?
  2. How do you define happiness or being happy? What qualities of an experience or activity contribute to feeling happy, fulfilled, or a sense of enjoyment? What personal qualities, values, beliefs, or perspectives contribute to your feeling happy? (What you bring to the experience.)
  3. If you were a scientist or psychologist studying "happiness," what would you want to look at, study, or question?

Scripture Texts (NRSV) for Sunday, February 18, 2007.
(Text links are to oremus Bible Browser. Oremus Bible Browser is not affiliated with or supported by the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. You can find the calendar of readings for Year C at Lectionary Readings.)

Exodus 34:29-35
Psalm 99
2 Corinthians 3:12-4:2
Luke 9:28-36 (37-43)

For lectionary humor and insight, check the weekly comic Agnus Day.

Gospel Reflection
This gospel story is a fairly familiar one. Do you remember it? Peter, James and John go up a mountain with Jesus to pray. They have an amazing spiritual experience and think about how wonderful it would be to just stay up on the mountain with Jesus. Life is good and we’re happy; why shake it up? You know the ending—they have to come down from their “mountaintop experience.” This is the part of the story we like to focus on, but what comes next is kind of interesting.

Maybe Jesus is not so happy to come down from the mountain either, but he does. Right away he and the disciples are surrounded by a crowd of people and a man whose son is having seizures or convulsions. The disciples failed to cure his son, and now he is shouting and begging for Jesus to heal his son. He’s frantic with worry about his son.

And now we see the smiling, calm, soft spoken, happy Jesus turn and heal the shrieking boy him with a wave of the hand. Right? Wrong. Jesus seems to snap. "Jesus answered, 'You faithless and perverse generation, how much longer must I be with you and bear with you? Bring your son here.'" He’s clearly upset and impatient. If we had been among the disciples or crowd we might have been thinking, "Uh, oh…"

In spite of his sharp reply, Jesus heals the boy and returns him to his worried father. Jesus could have said to him "tough luck" and walked away, but he didn’t. No matter what was going on inside of him, Jesus fulfilled his mission and God’s promises; not an easy task, even for the Son of God.

Discussion Questions

  1. Describe Jesus. What are his qualities and powers as both God and human being? How does art portray him? How does society like to describe him? Are these accurate or fair descriptions? Why or why not?
  2. Why do you think Jesus grew impatient with people? (It’s not the only time described in the Bible when Jesus seemed frustrated or even angry.) Name some other times when Jesus got angry, frustrated, or saddened by the people around him. What was going on in each situation?
  3. As a person of faith—a follower of Jesus—when do you get frustrated with the people around you? (Including other Christians or members of your congregation) In those situations, what’s your first reaction or thing you want to do?
  4. In spite of the frustrations or sadness you may feel at times, what gives you:
  • Hope
  • Faith
  • Patience
  • Courage
  • Strength
  • Happiness
  • Peace
  • Joy
  • The ability to do what you’d rather avoid?

Activity Suggestions

On a 3x5 card or a small piece of paper, write one thing that you resist or get frustrated with when it comes to being a servant of Christ, living the gospel, or caring for others. Fold them in half and collect them in a container or bowl. Whenever you gather as a group, have several young people pull out cards. Add the specific concerns on the cards to your prayers together. Toss the cards back into the bowl for another time. You may want to add petitions to the bowl as time goes on or leave it out for people to add to. (Try to not name specific people or situations that may be recognizable to the group, unless it addresses an issue that you are all aware of and working on together.)

  Closing Prayer

Our God of mercy and grace, forgive us for the times when we would rather not do what you ask us to do. Forgive us when we run the other way. We stand before you and ask that your Spirit would give us courage, patience, and the willingness to take whatever risks we need to in order to be faithful witnesses of your great love, forgiveness, healing, justice, and Word. And in the midst of our struggles, open our hearts and understanding to the joy and peace that can only come from you. We pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen
 

Contributed by Rod G. Boriack
Chicago, IL

Permission to reproduce for local use. Copyright © 2007 Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. ELCA Youth Ministries. 1-800-638-3522, ext. 2447. To offer your comments or responses to Faith Lens, e-mail:  rod.boriack@elca.org.

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